I certainly don't believe in reincarnation as a form of karma. I am me and can only be justifiably punished or rewarded for my actions in this life. And some people are the embodiment of evil, they do not deserve to live again no matter what the circumstances. (I'm talking about for example well educated terrorists, those who do the radicalising of disenfranchised young people rather than selfie stick users and the like.)
When I'm feeling sorry for myself (Monday-Friday, 9-5. Who says I don't have a full time job?) I sometimes think of any immoral actions I have done in my life and whether they justify my current condition. In short, no they do not! When I was a student I often put broccoli through as carrots on the self service checkout because it was slightly cheaper. (I know, what sort of student eats broccoli?!) That's not exactly crime of the century, I knew a girl at uni who put an electric toothbrush through as some apples. I'm sure I've done some more morally questionably actions over the years (I know I have!) which I'll not mention but they don't justify me getting MS either.
I asked a friend on Saturday if she believes in karma and she said she does. (Siri originally put 'she cooks' there. Anyone who knows anything about Kirsty knows that to be incorrect.) I said I struggled with the idea because I don't understand why I have MS. She offered another way of looking at it, rather than thinking of the bad I have done to cause MS, instead consider the good that has come from it. She said I have numerous qualities now that I did not have beforehand. I think what she meant is that I could be a bit of a miserable twat beforehand whereas now I'm just a bit of a twat. (Only in the best and most endearing ways of course, like sarcasm and wit.) Charming she is not but I like that approach to karma all the same. (And I acknowledge my drunk chat really needs improving.)
I asked a friend on Saturday if she believes in karma and she said she does. (Siri originally put 'she cooks' there. Anyone who knows anything about Kirsty knows that to be incorrect.) I said I struggled with the idea because I don't understand why I have MS. She offered another way of looking at it, rather than thinking of the bad I have done to cause MS, instead consider the good that has come from it. She said I have numerous qualities now that I did not have beforehand. I think what she meant is that I could be a bit of a miserable twat beforehand whereas now I'm just a bit of a twat. (Only in the best and most endearing ways of course, like sarcasm and wit.) Charming she is not but I like that approach to karma all the same. (And I acknowledge my drunk chat really needs improving.)
Some good has come from me getting MS. I have grown as a person. (I've put on about 10kgs but I do occasionally look past appearance and consider personal qualities too.) I'm much more comfortable with who I am and resultingly much more self confident. (Some might argue too self confident but they're just jealous because I'm better looking than they are.) I've also transformed from an introvert to an extrovert. I feel very self-conscious about my condition in public and to mask this I joke about it and try to act relatively care free. And I have come to learn that speaking to people and being perfectly content with the person you are (I'm Patrick and I'm class by the way.) actually makes you happy. I will be happier still once my condition improves but I will never lose these character traits.
Perhaps karma does exist but not always in the ways we expect or would like.
As for my karma-ful weekend? I was originally intending to go to Cardiff with the lads but it has been apparent for a while now that I'm not really strong enough. I was pretty gutted to miss it because we don't see enough of each other. But it did mean I was in Sunderland and could go to the live music night at Fausto on Friday which was excellent as always.
And Kirsty said she could come up on the Saturday. That meant curry and lots of drinking so all was fair. Come Sunday Kirsty was massively hungover, I felt okay and that was fair as well because she laughed at me when I fell over at about two in the morning outside of a bar which was definitely caused by MS and not because I was at all drunk.
And Kirsty said she could come up on the Saturday. That meant curry and lots of drinking so all was fair. Come Sunday Kirsty was massively hungover, I felt okay and that was fair as well because she laughed at me when I fell over at about two in the morning outside of a bar which was definitely caused by MS and not because I was at all drunk.
I spent most of the day laughing at/annoying her (I thought everybody liked Brush Your Teeth by Lady Leisha.) and karma has once again proved itself as I feel terrible today (Monday). Unlike Kirsty yesterday though I have at least been able to get out of bed before half five in the evening and been slightly productive which again is only fair because I'm a better person than she is.
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