I wanna be adored.

Choosing to title my posts with song names or lyrics has put an unexpected pressure on me. I need to show I have a diverse taste in music that is as cool as I am. (Come on, this is my fourth blog, surely you've realised how sarcastic I am by now?) This week The Stone Roses next week who knows, maybe Dido? (After all, 'there will be no white flag above my door', I'm going to beat MS.)

I'll admit it, I wanna be adored. I think everyone does, I'm just vain enough to say it. (I never play the disabled card but I think my disability is a bit like when a young child's pet dies. Said child gets a bit more leniency from teachers and parents because they're going through a tough time, and so am I, so I get to be a bit more vain, cheeky, flirtatious, that sort of thing. Fair right?) Okay, maybe adored is a bit strong, I mean I don't want to be worshipped or anything but it's not as if there's a song called 'I wanna be liked' is there?

There are lots of things I wish I could do that I perceive as likeable. (Aside from the obvious: seeing, walking, shagging (awful word by the way, sex should be a verb, sexing sounds much better) etc.) I wish I could sing and dance, these are the only two things stopping me from becoming a pop sensation. I'm actually probably a world-class dancer, I've just always refused to dance. (I'll maybe do the first dance at my wedding but only if she's pretty. Which she will be or else we wouldn't be marrying. Vain, remember?) I have tried singing though and I'm definitely not very good at that.

I also wish I was good at telling jokes and stories, these are the only two things stopping me from becoming a stand-up sensation. I once knew a guy who said you need two things in life: a good joke and a good story. Mind, he would say that as he had plenty of both and was great at telling them. (My favourite story being robo-Ho if you're reading Pete.) My problem is that as I approach the punchline/funny bit I break out into hysterical fits of laughter, before being able to tell my eagerly awaiting audience said punchline/funny bit. At least I think I'm funny.

One likeable trait I do possess though is that I am very quick to laugh at myself. (Not just at my stories but  in a self deprecating kind of way.) In general, the British deplore arrogance, dislike confidence, like modesty and adore it when somebody takes the piss out of themselves. I do a bit of each of the latter three but I'm particularly good at the final one. I don't know why we feel a sense of warmth towards self mocking so much but we do. The way I see it is that if you can't laugh at yourself then you have no right to laugh at anything, and life without laughter isn't life at all.

It's also true that laughter is the best medicine. I don't find any part of MS funny but being able to laugh at some of my problems helps me and helps others. The last thing anyone wants to see is somebody moping about, feeling sorry for themselves. If I can laugh about certain aspects of my condition and put others at ease then they'll be more inclined to like me. And if I'm liked, maybe one day I'll be adored.